Featuring yours truly and various comics who mostly prefer to go by the name anon, except for John Fothergill (Mate 2) and Lewis Schaffer (Barry).
Music by Noah Fleetwood. Audio mixed by Wayne McIntyre.
LYRICS:
DOM:
I’ve fallen so in love with this girl
Her name is … Gary
My mates says say Gary isn’t actually a girl
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
MATE 1:
Is this some kind of joke
Gary is a bloke
DOM:
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
MATE 2:
This is just absurd
Gary’s not a bird
DOM
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
DOM
Gary likes football and quizzes and going down the pub
And in the summer time she hangs out at the cricket club
I’m wanna marry Gary
MATE 1
Gary’s got a beard
You’re being very weird
DOM
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
MATE 2:
She opens the batting
She looks like Mike Gatting
DOM
I don’t care
I wanna marry Gary
Gary’s having time off from her job. She’s a scaffolder
Cos at the weekend playing rugby, she dislocated her shoulder
MATE 1
You’re having a laugh
Gary plays scrum half
DOM
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
MATE 2
Gary’s not a dame
The clue is in his name
DOM
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
Gary likes steak and baked potato for her tea
And then she’ll watch a science programme on Discovery
I’m going to marry Gary
MATE 1:
Gary’s got a van
Gary is a man
DOM:
I don’t care
I want to marry Gary
MATE 2:
He’s got a hairy back
And a hairy sack
DOM
I don’t care
I’m going to marry Gary
Gary says gender is nothing more than a social construct
My mates say Gary’s talking out of her rectal duct
I’m going to marry Gary
MATE 1
It’s not hard to tell
This will not end well
DOM
I don’t care
I’m going to marry Gary
MATE 2
You’ll have a nasty shock
Gary’s got a cock
DOM
I don’t care
I’m going to marry Gary
MATE 1
We’ve been here before
Several times before)
DOM
I don’t care
BOTH MATES
There was your girlfriend Barry
And then before that Harry
And what became of Larry?
DOM:
I don’t care
Gary, Gary, Gary